Many of you, understandably (and awesomely) have questions about wtf this book is all about - sooooo, we are taking your questions in our Tumblr ask box, and will answer 4 every Saturday until we answer them all!
Is there a chapter in your book for parents that deals with how to handle when your gay kids want to get married? Just curious.
You bet your bippee. Sorry for saying bippee.
Yes, the book has several questions that discuss marriage — from the religious conversations/question/issues, to the political, and everything in between. What’s more, there’s a whole chapter called “Thinking About the Future,” where we talk to parents about the many structures of family, and being open to the many possibilities that lie ahead for any of their kids.
Hi Kristin and Dannielle! I really want to buy your book for my parents, because I’m not sure they’re handling me being gay as well as they could. I know they love me, and they care enough to try and be supportive, but I’m afraid they’ll be angry that I’m trying to educate them or that I think I’m smarter than them. (I know I’m allowed those things, they’re still refusing to understand that) I’m not sure how to even approach the subject with them… - shinybloodredapple
This is a great question, Shiny Apple.
Although this may not be the reality… no one should ever be put off by the idea of learning more about a community with which they don’t have much experience. However, we get it. People, your parents or not, can be defensive when it comes to things that they don’t know.
So, we suggest that, instead of making it about them learning, you make it about you wanting to be closer to them, because they are your family and you love them. If you present it as something you did because you love them and want to feel closer to them, that is very different than saying, “You don’t know anything, read this.” You know?
Let them know that the book is, at it’s core, about talking to one another. Maybe your parents don’t have (or don’t think they have) questions, maybe your parents don’t feel they “need” to read a book. That doesn’t mean that they can’t work with you because of things that would mean a lot to you. Try saying something like, ‘Here’s the thing. There is a ton of stuff in this book that I’d love to talk to you about, but I don’t know how to bring it up, or I don’t know what exactly to say or how to phrase things. So, it would mean a lot to me if you’d read it. Then maybe we could talk?”
Essentially, that’s the truth. You want your parents to read it for the good of your whole family, and not because you think they are stupid!
Will your book be available in Spanish or in any other foreign languages?
This is all dependent on interest! If other countries learn about our book and decide/realize/etc that their community would also benefit from it, then they will request the book in another language and then grown up stuff happens that we don’t understand and VOILA, THIS IS A BOOK IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE, SUCKASSSS.
Will there be content in the book addressing parents of kids who are bi or pan? I wanna get it for my mom but I’m not a kinsey-6 gaymo. :)
We absolutely address pan & bi identity. In addition to having specific questions like “My child is bisexual. Does this mean that they can later choose to be straight?,” the majority of the questions are written to address parents of kids with a huge range of identity. Check out the reasoning for our title here!
We also have a glossary at the back of the book which has a full list of terms for parents / folks who don’t know what a lot of words mean. ALSO, a lot of our advice isn’t about who you’re sleeping with, specifically, it’s about communication, honesty, and how to create a warm and open environment in your home so kids of any identity can feel safe and comfy as f*ck.